1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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