ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
