actually, I'm a sock model
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
