I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize