so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
oh god was she eating orange peels again
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
