i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
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