Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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