He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
