yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
