3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize