I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Sacagawea was the original milf.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Panties = found
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
