If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
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