there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
It's rum buckets o'clock
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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