i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
