Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Randomize
