as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
