shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
