youre lurking in front of me
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
He did a backflip because drugs
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
