I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
