Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Randomize