you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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