He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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