im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
