separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Randomize
