every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
