I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
