Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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