ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I love you. Go after that dick
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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