new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
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