sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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