Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
We had to coat check the pizza.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
