Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize