He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
