The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
