why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
