Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
