have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize