I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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