pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
