You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize