Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
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