I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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