Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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