I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Randomize