And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
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