It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Randomize
