woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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