Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize