Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize
