doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Someone signed my nipple.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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