I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize